If you’ve been reading this story since day one, you’ll have known that it has been a very lonely, sometimes heartbreaking journey. I’ve been searching for that special person to come into my life and show me what a life of happiness could be like, and for a very long time, this special person was nowhere to be found.

For such a long time I felt like I wouldn’t find her, and then, all of a sudden there was a bright ray of hope in my life.

Her name, as I was to find out, was Ruth, and things were great.

I wanted to show her so many things and share so many experiences with her. She would teach me so many things, and in a way, she’s made me better.

Being a college student, she’s been getting ready to go to university, and its something I was getting myself ready for too.

After a very lengthy goodbye one night, Ruth mentioned that it would be great if we lived together, so plans were made for if she got into a certain institution, that she would spend a first year in halls, and then we’d move in together some time in 2010, and it would be the beginning of our happily ever after.

 Christmas and New Years were brilliant I was deeply in love, and every moment I spent with her was so special, full of magic and wonder. Every time we had to say goodbye or goodnight was agony, made up only by the next time we said hello.

And for a time, things were great.

When I write these things, I normally have a structure that I work to, and its linear, and makes sense. Right now, I’m trying to figure out the last three months, and figure out what goes where. I believe the next thing I have to write about is Hack Green.

 Hack Green is in the middle of Cheshire. Its a decommissioned Nuclear Bunker near Nantwich. We were there for a reason other than what it was intended for. Myself, two of my cadets and one of their friends arrived to meet a group of people we didn’t know. One of which I’d spoken to only a few times.

 I was there because I was interested to see if I could contact any of the Spirits that may have been there, and there were.
In total, there was Amy, a WRAF operator who was near the main vent system.
Two servicemen were in the room where they keep the ejector seats. In the office area, there was an RAF officer from WW2.
In the storage area, I found another officer and his number 2.
The strange thing about the store room, was when I got charged by something that looked like a dark shadow. Later on the room stank of sulphur. Those of you who know what this means will understand why I didn’t want to go back.

Something lasting that came out of the trip to Hack Green was a relationship for one of my cadets, Emily. But we’ll come back to that in a minute.

Also in here somewhere was the dining in night for the Air Cadets. The night was amazing. I missed all the pomp and grandure of it all. I got an absolute soaking in alcohol that night, thanks to a Navy officer banging on the table, but it was brilliant. There’ll be a picture around somewhere I suspect.
There was only one minor hiccup, when one of the cadets boyfriends got drunk at the beginning of the night and showed himself and the cadet up something rotten. He was told to calm down by the bosses father, but instead of calm down, he stormed off like a petulant child.
Speaking of the boss, she got promoted on the spot to Flight Lieutenant, which is brilliant!

 So, a good couple of months for me, but my story has never been easy. The hardest things for me to write about are the happy times. The times when I’m happy are the hardest because I don’t want to tempt fate.
I’d hate it to all come crashing down around me, so that’s why there’s a massive gap between season three and four. I was happy, and didn’t want it to end.
Like all good things though, it ended. Ruth fell out of love with me, and didn’t know how to get the feelings back. It was a new kind of pain, because I couldn’t get a clear reason for why it ended. All the love I had for her stayed inside, but trapped in a deep dark hole. With other relationships, the love turned to hate, but not this time. It stayed as true love. Trapped, and unable to be expressed. I lost the person I thought I was supposed to have my happily ever after with, and slipped into what I would generally call a depression, which at the moment of writing, I’m still in.

I’m trying to control it though, so less people are noticing, but my friends have been fantastic. Alan, Emma, Alex and Chloe, Jessica and Gemma from work, and the old Radio Gang from Derby.
I even went out one night with the guys from Biddulph.

Through all the people that need a special mention though, is Sarah Franklin.
I’ve never met Sarah in person. We’ve only ever spoken on facebook, yet I feel like I can tell her anything, and often have. She’s invited me to her engagement party, which I’ll be happily attending and she told me the brilliant news that she and her fiancé are expecting their first child. Which is brilliant.
It’ll be good to meet her, finally. The start of a new era. Feel like I have a friend for life in Sarah. It’s a similar feeling I had with Debbie Greenwood and Ruth Acaster, both my old co-hosts from the radio.

I thought it was time to come back to the story as a friend I used to know from college read the other three seasons and left this comment;
“I’ve just finished reading and I am mightily impressed.
Seems you’ve conquered it all and come through the other side, I feel like you have lived the life of a 50yr old and not 25?
But I seriously think this is a good thing as you seem wiser and more knowledgeable, I don’t think your having a mid life crisis, your just finding out more about yourself...  Read more and again that always a good thing, your a different guy to the college days and I like you more now than I did then (you were a bit of prat).
But John I am gutted there’s not more?? It’s like a book that has had the last few pages torn out??
Its left me intrigued and wanting to no more?? So write again!!! Please god-damn it, and on a closing note: YOU'RE FAB xoxo”

 Holly Tudor, that note you left me gave me the strength to write this first chapter, so thank you so much.
It seems like I’m back on the journey alone again for the time being.  

I wonder what’s coming for me this time?